There are so many wonderful reasons we live in the paradise of Tropical North Queensland.
Then there's the wet season.
It begins with stifling heat and when the monsoon rain finally comes, it's a relief....
But then it falls...and it falls....and it falls.
Here are 21 reasons you know you've survived a decent wet.
Everywhere you go - even the end of your driveway - involves an Olympic-style long jump.
2. %$#&! flies!
A brief respite from the rain....and the flies start. Don't. Leave. Your. Door. Open. Even a crack.
3. Humidity = hair havoc
4. Wet car smell
It smells like wet dog - but you don't even have a dog!
5. Ah. This might have something to do with it.
6. Meanwhile, on the subject of cars combined with wet weather...
Bad drivers in TNQ are like Gremlins: just add water and they multiply. You find yourself driving ON EDGE. Every other car is the enemy.
Giant craters emerge in the time it takes to drive around the block. Just another reason to avoid the roads.
8. And another one...
9. Comfort food!
It's slightly cooler and dark - $%* the fact it's 30 degrees and the middle of summer - it feels like winter. So you get cooking.....soups, pot roasts, hot chocolate anyone?
10. The smoke detector begins chirping
It's the soundtrack of the Cairns monsoon.
11. All hail the gales
The logical, sensible side in us knows cyclones are dangerous and destructive. Our absolutely bonkers thrill-seeking side, however, gets up for a boogey the moment we hear the magic words: “low pressure system developing in the Coral Sea…” And there’s no more stirring summer soundtrack than the BWAMP BWAMP BWAMP of the Standard Emergency Warning Signal.
12. Cabin fever
You never really understood why that guy in The Shining went insane just because he was stuck indoors. Until now.
13. And....kids with cabin fever.
The wet season generally falls during school holiday time. 'Nuff said.
14. Then, when school goes back....
No need for an expensive trip to the reef, when school drop-off is like this!
15. Everything. Is. Damp.
The laundry that’s been hanging on your line for three weeks flaps like soggy flags of failure. You won't use the dryer because your electricity bill is already sky-high due to pumping air-con 24-7. You give up caring about the soggy laundry. You wear damp clothes. You smell like mould.
16. Speaking of mould...
Your leather shoes have sprouted white polka dots, the school hat you've pulled out of the cupboard from last year has turned blotchy grey, or you've made the unforgivable mistake of turning off the ceiling fan.
17. Hot-to-trot crocs
It's crocodile breeding season. And that means our salties get snappy protecting their eggs and floods mean they can – and do – turn up anywhere. Fancy a stroll?
18. Terrible umbrella carriers
While walking down a busy street in the Cairns CBD, please note that keeping yourself dry and not puncturing the cornea of the person beside you are not mutually exclusive concepts.
19. It's a jungle out there
It's been awhile since it was dry enough to mow the lawn and you can literally see the grass growing. Then, when the rain stops - it's a mass mow! Everyone is doing it.
20. Frog songs
What you've always deemed to be cute, is suddenly nocturnally annoying.
21. Pride in the rainfall totals
Friends down south: We got 100 millimetres in a week!
Us: Pft! - We get that in half an hour. It's nothing. Harden up!